Friday Confession: People are all talk
People love to hear themselves talk. I’ll admit it; I’m included in that too. But one thing that really bothers me is when there is no action behind that talk. You know when someone starts to tell you ALL these things they are going to do, yet they rarely begin. So you just wasted my time listening to ALL these exciting and amazing things that I know you would excel at, and your own time describing and explaining it ALL to me. I read an article a few months ago, that mentioned the moment we tell others our goals and aspirations or even things we want to do, we then feel a bit of accomplishment. As if we have accomplished something by merely talking. Sounds so odd, but I began to notice when I did it, and when others would do it.
People love to hear themselves talk. I’ll admit it; I’m included in that too. But one thing that really bothers me is when there is no action behind that talk. You know when someone starts to tell you ALL these things they are going to do, yet they rarely begin. So you just wasted my time listening to ALL these exciting and amazing things that I know you would excel at, and your own time describing and explaining it ALL to me. I read an article a few months ago, that mentioned the moment we tell others our goals and aspirations or even things we want to do, we then feel a bit of accomplishment. As if we have accomplished something by merely talking. Sounds so odd, but I began to notice when I did it, and when others would do it.
In coaching, mentoring, and therapy I hear talk more so than the average. Now don’t get me wrong, I love what I do, because I love helping. However, I’m no help if the person has no follow through. We all want to change, but very few are willing to put forth the efforts to accomplish the change. In graduate school, I learned many theories and reasons as to why people change, as well as why they don’t. In order to change the pain (or unwanted thing/event) must be so unbearable that you can't imagine feeling (dealing with) it anymore. Very commonsensical, who would continue to do things that they don’t like, right? Wrong! Everyday people do it. That job they complain about, yet guess where they are still employed at? That friend that drives them crazy, guess who they are hanging out with this weekend? So many situations…can you think of any in your life?
In looking at my own life, I rarely made a change until I decided the “pain” was too much to bear. When I had my first son, I was 18 years old and undecided about college. I would go then I would quit then I would go again, and I would quit again. I played a refund game with Sally Mae for a few years. I would go long enough to get my refund check, and then I would drop out. I had my daughter at 21 years old and I hated the jobs that were available to me, and that’s IF I worked. Between my parents supporting me and my Huni, I was in my comfort zone. The “pain” wasn’t bad enough to make a change. I quit a “good job,” and decided I really wanted more. I needed more freedom, I wanted fulfillment, I didn’t appreciate the way the clientele would talk to me. And this is back when my attitude was “nuck if you buck,” and I hadn’t fine-tuned my assertiveness. I went back to college and did exceptionally well. My pain was too much to bear.
I want you to really think about things that you want to change, how bad is the pain? Is that why you haven’t made any progress towards this change? Do you even want to change?
I’ll leave you with this, before verbalizing any changes you want to make, do, or embark on, write it down and an estimated completion date. Include one actionable step you can do within two days to get the process going. Once that’s completed tell two people and give them your estimated completion date. These people should be persons that will hold you accountable to your date.
Daily Affirmation: Own your story, trust your process
I own my story and trust my process, fully! Read it, believe it, receive it!
I often say "own your story and trust your struggle!" What does all that mean? Every situation, every circumstance, everything that makes you- you...own it!
Accept it! Embrace it! It's your story, it's not going anywhere. Forgive yourself and forgive others! I’m not going to lie and say that’s an easy task. However, you will forever be stuck, until you OWN it, even if it seems that you are moving forward.
Once you own that story, share it with others, share it often. Not everyone will appreciate your story, and guess what?!? That's fine! You will know who you feel comfortable and trust enough to share with. Healing will begin and change will ignite.
Then pick up that imaginary pen and keep writing and living. This time eliminate the pain, the fear, guilt, and anything that was holding you back. Learn from your own stories and mend the error in your thought process to avoid operator error in your upcoming chapters.
Own your story, trust your struggles. No pity parties. This isn't about all the wrongs, but how you can bring all the right! It's your social obligation to let your light shine.
Positive thoughts will make magnificent changes in your life. If you know someone who could benefit from these affirmations, share away!
Daily Affirmations: I trust myself to make great decisions
I trust myself to make great decisions! Read it, believe it, receive it! Positive thoughts will make magnificent changes in your life. If you know someone who could benefit from these affirmations, share away!
Daily Affirmation: Success
I succeed with ease! Read it, believe it, receive it! Every successful person has experienced some sort of failure. Embedded in that failure was an important lesson that leads to knowledge and growth. The lesson prepared the individual for something greater than they were even imagining. Your success is waiting on you to claim it. Stop worrying about the possible failures or obstacles. Believe that you are successful and you deserve to be happy and live your dreams. Stop saying you WANT to be successful. Start saying you ARE successful and watch you begin to succeed with ease. Positive thoughts will make magnificent changes in your life. If you know someone who could benefit from these affirmations, share away!
